The Anoka-Hennepin school district declined to comment on any specific incidences but denies any discrimination, maintaining that its broad anti-bullying policy is meant to protect all students.

Photo © Richard Tsong-Taatarii/Minneapolis Star Tribune/ZUMApress.com

This Rolling Stone article on the unfathomable disaster that is the Anoka-Hennepin school district in Minnesota is an absolute must-read. If you care at all about our kids, stop what you are doing right now and read this. Forward it to the School Board, to the PTAs, to the counselors, and anyone else you can think of who might be inclined to think there could be such as thing as “neutrality” with regard to the presence of LGBT students in our schools.

And as you are reading, recall the School Board public comment sessions that dragged on for hours back in 2005, when then-Delegate Dick Black and his family instigated an assault on Loudoun County Public Schools drama departments. The policy that their cell of anti-gay activists demanded – and wanted to extend to all areas of school policy and the curriculum – was exactly what a similar cell of anti-gay activists in Anoka-Hennepin was able to achieve: A policy dictating that “homosexuality not be taught/addressed as a normal, valid lifestyle.” They won that policy through a sustained campaign of lies and defamation – and getting their operatives appointed to a policy review committee.

That policy was later revised – once the School Board’s legal counsel advised that it would be hard to defend in court – to one reading: “Anoka-Hennepin staff, in the course of their professional duties, shall remain neutral on matters regarding sexual orientation including but not limited to student-led discussions.” The language was designed by the legal department to both avoid potential lawsuits and “to appease the area’s evangelical activists.” As you will see, the revision only made things worse, because “no one could figure out what it meant.”

What it meant from the perspective of the kids is very clear, however.

The silence of adults was deafening. At Blaine High School, says alum Justin Anderson, “I would hear people calling people ‘fags’ all the time without it being addressed. Teachers just didn’t respond.” In Andover High School, when 10th-grader Sam Pinilla was pushed to the ground by three kids calling him a “faggot,” he saw a teacher nearby who did nothing to stop the assault. At Anoka High School, a 10th-grade girl became so upset at being mocked as a “lesbo” and a “sinner” – in earshot of teachers – that she complained to an associate principal, who counseled her to “lay low”; the girl would later attempt suicide. At Anoka Middle School for the Arts, after Kyle Rooker was urinated upon from above in a boys’ bathroom stall, an associate principal told him, “It was probably water.” Jackson Middle School seventh-grader Dylon Frei was passed notes saying, “Get out of this town, fag”; when a teacher intercepted one such note, she simply threw it away.

“You feel horrible about yourself,” remembers Dylon. “Like, why do these kids hate me so much? And why won’t anybody help me?” The following year, after Dylon was hit in the head with a binder and called “fag,” the associate principal told Dylon that since there was no proof of the incident she could take no action. By contrast, Dylon and others saw how the same teachers who ignored anti-gay insults were quick to reprimand kids who uttered racial slurs. It further reinforced the message resonating throughout the district: Gay kids simply didn’t deserve protection.

Below is some of the language the Minnesota anti-gay activists have used in public. If you were around Loudoun during that spring and summer of 2005, it may have a familiar ring. If not, you can review the sort of thing we heard and read under “Equality Loudoun reports” in this archive, and in our Hall of Shame. Understand that then-Delegate Black is now Senator Black. His family members and others who participated in that sustained verbal assault on Loudoun residents, people like Patricia Phillips of CWA, are still here and still involved in politics. Students from Patrick Henry College were again heavily involved in our local elections in November.

Religious conservatives have called GSAs “sex clubs,” and sure enough, the local religious right loudly objected to them. “This is an assault on moral standards,” read one recent letter to the community paper. “Let’s stop this dangerous nonsense before it’s too late and more young boys and girls are encouraged to ‘come out’ and practice their ‘gayness’ right in their own school’s homosexual club.”

And these are some of the things they said after eight Anoka-Hennepin students had committed suicide:

Anti-gay backlash was instant. Minnesota Family Council president Tom Prichard blogged that Justin’s suicide could only be blamed upon one thing: his gayness. “Youth who embrace homosexuality are at greater risk [of suicide], because they’ve embraced an unhealthy sexual identity and lifestyle,” Prichard wrote. Anoka-Hennepin conservatives formally organized into the Parents Action League, declaring opposition to the “radical homosexual” agenda in schools. Its stated goals, advertised on its website, included promoting Day of Truth, providing resources for students “seeking to leave the homosexual lifestyle,” supporting the neutrality policy and targeting “pro-gay activist teachers who fail to abide by district policies.”

Asked on a radio program whether the anti-gay agenda of her ilk bore any responsibility for the bullying and suicides, Barb Anderson, co-author of the original “No Homo Promo,” held fast to her principles, blaming pro-gay groups for the tragedies. She explained that such “child corruption” agencies allow “quote-unquote gay kids” to wrongly feel legitimized. “And then these kids are locked into a lifestyle with their choices limited, and many times this can be disastrous to them as they get into the behavior which leads to disease and death,” Anderson said. She added that if LGBT kids weren’t encouraged to come out of the closet in the first place, they wouldn’t be in a position to be bullied.

This is the story of how a “suicide cluster” formed, and the criminal response to it by the School Board and administration, a response that continues to this day. But the vicious anti-gay bullying described here is not an isolated or unusual problem. It happens all across the country, and at an astonishing rate. Here’s yet another case in which a youth is having to resort to legal action, because his school district has for years ignored his reports of escalating bullying. The unusual thing is when such a case is reported and becomes known to the public. According to a 2009 national survey of LGBT youth by GLSEN, “nine out of ten reported experiencing harassment at their school within the past year based on their sexual orientation or gender identity, and two-thirds said they felt unsafe at school because of who they are.”

Given the things that have gone on in Loudoun, the continuing behavior of some of our elected officials, and the fact that the very first action of the newly elected School Board was to delete this human rights concern from its Legislative program, is it any wonder that we feel the need to watch closely with regard to the climate and policies in Loudoun County Public Schools?

NO.

As a REALTOR, I would be violating Fair Housing Laws and REALTOR Code of Ethics if I did.

However, as a Home Buyer you have the LEGAL right to research neighborhoods and then let me know what area you are interested in. To do the research you could use some of the resources on my web site. Fair enough?

Actually, no. You could only use those “resources” now if you are a certain, special kind of person: One who doesn’t ask Ms. Rutkowski “too hard” questions like why she thinks a homebuyer who attends church every Sunday and wants to live in a “cul-de-sack” where his or her children “can play safely” would be “VERY unhappy” to have a gay couple also raising children as neighbors; where did she learn the things she thinks she knows about LGBT people; and where did she get the offensive language she used in the post that resulted in her termination.

Happily, the affiliation with Keller Williams has now (finally!) been removed from her other website.

I was not, as I said, happy to learn that this obviously clueless woman had lost her job because of a two year old post I discovered by accident, and I kind of felt bad for her. That was before she embarked on a mission to make that impossible.

Last week I accidentally discovered a blog post – “Loudoun County in Virginia going Gay, Lesbian and Transgender” – published shortly after the Board of Supervisors voted to revise the county’s Human Resources Policy Handbook in 2010.

Written by Vivianne Rutkowski (pictured at left), a local Realtor affiliated with Keller Williams in Leesburg, the post made the offensive, ridiculous assumption that prohibiting discrimination against LGBT county employees would have a negative effect on the Loudoun real estate market. It also contained very ignorant and defamatory language of the sort one hears from hate groups obsessed with public restroom use. Ms. Rutkowski’s response to criticism only made things worse.

I want to immediately say that the responsiveness of Keller Williams to this situation has been outstanding. None of Ms. Rutkowski’s superiors at the agency were aware of this post, and are very grateful to us for calling it to their attention. This has been treated as a very serious matter with the potential to do real damage to their reputation and that of the real estate profession as a whole.

Regional Director Tipper Williams in particular deserves praise for the way she has responded to this, which has been both professional (this is an internal personnel matter) and very apologetic. Ms. Williams has shared with me and others who contacted her that after meeting with her on Monday, Ms. Rutkowski’s association with Keller Williams has been terminated. That notification reads in part:

I wanted to formally notify you, as promised, the steps that were taken today regarding Vivianne Rutkowski. We have officially removed her as an agent with Keller Williams Realty. She has been notified and her license sent back to the Real Estate Commission. Although she was instructed last week to remove all logos and names that affiliated her with Keller Williams Realty, she must now legally comply as she is no longer affiliated with our company.

As I stated in our phone call, this type of unprofessional and destructive behavior will not be tolerated within my company.

Some people have asked me about the Keller Williams logo and affiliation still appearing on Ms. Rutkowski’s blog, as she was reportedly told to remove them on Friday along with the post. This is her personal real estate blog, and my speculation is that someone else set it up for her and she doesn’t know how to remove items from the sidebar. Her profile is still linked from the Keller Williams Leesburg website, but that’s because those links go to a corporate site not under the Leesburg office’s control. She has already been removed from their directory of associates.

I can’t say that I’m happy about someone losing their job, especially someone who seems completely oblivious about why what she did was wrong. I don’t know whether any learning took place during that meeting. I hope so.

I am happy that the good folks at Keller Williams immediately recognized the seriousness of and acted on this offensive expression of prejudice. What it shows is that being associated with such ideas is instantly understood as bad for business, and that the action by the Board of Supervisors is aligned with mainstream business viewpoints. If that is such a no-brainer to the private sector, I have to wonder why we tolerate such fringe ideas from some of our public officials.

As a separate matter, ethics charges have been brought against Ms. Rutkowski with her local Board of Realtors (the Dulles Area Association of Realtors) pursuant to the National Association of Realtors Code of Ethics. The complaint will go through a review process, then if warranted, on to a full hearing.

That’s the truth spoken by Point Loma Nazarene University graduate Todd Clayton to the many, many other LGBT students and alumni who have contacted him since he began speaking out about his experience of reconciling his sexuality and Christian identity, and coming out at the university.

The shrewdest, loudest, most violent lie that LGBT people at Christian colleges and universities carry is this: that no one else like them exists. More important, and more enduring than the stares and questions and assaulting prayers, are the stories of the 70 current students, and 130 alumni who contacted me to say they had the same kind of dreams I did.

And that’s only from Point Loma. Students from across the nation sent messages my way, notes of gratitude and concern and question and fear.

It’s a truth that LGBT students at Patrick Henry College need to know. It might not seem that way now, because it’s a truth that authorities at the college work desperately to hide, but there is sanctuary for you. They may, like other institutions, refuse to acknowledge the reality of this “unstoppable force,” but they cannot change it.

The not-so-secret gospel news is that we’re everywhere, us gays. We’re your teachers and janitors and friends and pastors. The question isn’t whether or not we exist; it’s what Christian colleges and universities are going to do with us.

Hang in there. No matter what you’ve been told, there is Christian community ready to embrace you as you were created.

The online version of the article “Gay rights group slams Delgaudio email” (January 17) was headlined “Delgaudio: ‘Human Rights Campaign can’t silence me,’” indicating Mr. Delgaudio’s belief that civil rights organizations want him to stop expressing himself. To the contrary, we want more people to become aware of his defamatory lies, statements designed to raise money for himself by inflaming hatred toward others and creating a threatening climate – demonstrated further by the fact that comments to the online article had to be closed and deleted for their vulgarity. We want everyone to understand exactly why Mr. Delgaudio is morally unfit to hold office, and to hold accountable those who give him political and financial support.

David and Jonathan Weintraub

Co-founders, Equality Loudoun

With voters changing their minds about equal rights for their neighbors, will the opponents of equality also be changing their minds about letting the people vote? Awkward.

Saturday, February 4, 2012, 2:00-4:00 pm
Silver Spring Civic Building
One Veterans Plaza
Silver Spring, Maryland 20910 (Click for map)

Presented by the Montgomery County Committee on Hate/Violence and the Montgomery County Office of Human Rights

Download flyer

Detailed information from the Montgomery County Office of Human Rights follows.

Montgomery County Committee on Hate/Violence and Montgomery County Office of Human Rights present:

Bullying in Schools: A Community Symposium on Prevention and Intervention Strategies
A Free Community Forum and Discussion for Parents, Students, Educators, Members and Leaders of the Business and Faith Communities

Reception to follow

Saturday, February 4, 2012
2:00-4:00 p.m.
Silver Spring Civic Building at Veterans Plaza
One Veterans Plaza
Silver Spring, Maryland 20910

In the past the COHV has taken a strong position on bullying and steps to take to minimize bullying incidents (see letter below from the COHV, dated November 17, 2010). In keeping with our commitment to address and share the “best practices” to thwart bullying, the COHV will hold a Bullying Symposium Saturday, February 4, 2012. The emphasis of the symposium is to address bullying in the educational sector. A moderator will lead a panel discussion, with a team of subject matter experts who will address factors which impact bullying.

Martin Castro, Chair U.S. Commission on Civil Rights, Keynote Speaker
Valerie Ervin, Councilmember, Montgomery County Council, Moderator

Panelists include:

• Johnnie Williams, Youth Advocate
• Montgomery County Public Schools
• National Association of School Psychologists
• National Center for Missing and Exploited Children
• Gay-Straight Alliance of Walt Whitman High School

Please request sign language interpreters and accommodation by January 31, 2012

For information:
CONTACT: Committee on Hate Violence
EMAIL: CommitteeonHateViolence@montgomerycountymd.gov
Website

Click here for Committee on Hate/Violence Letter Regarding Anti-Bullying Resources

For information:
CONTACT: Office of Human Rights
ADDRESS: 21 Maryland Ave., Suite 330, Rockville MD 20850
PHONE: (240) 777- 8450
EMAIL: Human-Rights.Administration@montgomerycountymd.gov
Website

Can you imagine if a Loudoun Realtor were to argue that they were helping home buyers make an “informed decision” regarding their home purchase by mouthing derogatory slurs about African-Americans and Jews, and complaining that the local government has required desegregation? Because this is the equivalent of that. Professional Realtors have a code of ethics, in part, due to awareness of how such bigotry has been practiced in the past.

Vivianne Rutkowski is a Realtor with Keller Williams on Catoctin Circle in Leesburg. I have contact information for her Broker and Regional Director, but I don’t want to publish it here. Contact me offline if you wish to communicate with them regarding this matter. Miss Rutkowski is bound by the code of ethics adopted by the National Association of Realtors.

I stumbled by accident across this wildly inappropriate, offensive post (it’s captured as it appeared Wednesday, January 25 at approximately 12:45 am) on her professional real estate business blog. I left a comment indicating that I would make sure no one I know would ever use her as an agent, and telling her why. Here are some screenshots of what she thought was appropriate content for a blog on which she presents herself to the public as a Realtor:

Can you believe the slurs and misgendering of trans people? It could have come right out of a Delgaudio hate mail. It’s also worth noting that this Realtor is a member of the Dulles Area Association of Realtors, a local organization flagged here as an unusual political outlier among associations. Can you even imagine a professional Realtor using such defamatory language about any other minority group and getting away with it? Trans people are a valuable part of this community, Miss Rutkowski. I suggest you get used to it.

Did she actually just express the assumption, as if it’s self-evident, that equal employment opportunity for LGBT people is incompatible with raising children? I guess the numerous LGBT families who moved here to raise children – not to mention the LGBT children of her straight clients – didn’t occur to her. And here’s one from her very long and ALL CAPS filled response to me, in which she tries to justify her expression of blatant prejudice:

First of all, if her blog was in fact “strictly about REAL ESTATE,” it obviously wouldn’t include a post with the title “Loudoun County in Virginia going Gay, Lesbian, and Transgender” consisting of nothing but ignorant slurs about gay, lesbian and transgender community members.

And can you imagine if a Loudoun Realtor were to argue in 2010 that they were helping home buyers make an “INFORMED decision” regarding their home purchase by mouthing derogatory slurs about African-Americans and Jews, and complaining that the local government has required desegregation? Because this is the equivalent of that. Professional Realtors have a code of ethics, in part, due to awareness of how such bigotry has been practiced in the past.

I would have accepted an apology from this woman on behalf of the community members she insulted before she wrote that.

Go sit in the corner, Miss Rutkowski. You screwed up.

Click to download poster

The Gay Men’s Chorus of Washington DC will perform an outreach concert to celebrate the one year anniversary of Loudoun Out Loud, the only Loudoun County PFLAG support group.

The kick-off celebration of Loudoun Out Loud was actually one year ago yesterday. We have made a lot of progress in Loudoun – but of course the real celebration will begin when support groups are no longer needed, anywhere, for people to just be who they are.

The press release from UUS is below.

Sterling, VA. – As part of its commitment to combat intolerance and injustice, the Unitarian Universalist Congregation of Sterling (UUCS) is pleased to welcome Potomac Fever and the Rock Creek Singers of the Gay Men’s Chorus. This evening of music and fun will celebrate the one year anniversary of Loudoun Out Loud (LOL) the only Loudoun County support group of gay, lesbian, transgender, questioning and queer youth and their parents. LOL meets at the Unitarian Universalist Congregation of Sterling.

The Gay Men’s Chorus of Washington delights audiences and champions gay equality with robust artistry, fun and surprise. GMCW has more than 275 singing members, nearly 100 support volunteers, more than 750 subscribers, nearly 500 donors and an annual audience of more than 10,000 people.

About Us
The Unitarian Universalist Congregation of Sterling offers a place where reason and spirituality converge. We welcome members of the community who are seeking such a religious home. Our mission is to make the community a better place to live by promoting a variety of religious expressions, working toward social justice, and fostering diversity. In order to carry out this mission, we covenant to listen to each other, encourage the exchange of creative thought, and respect our differences.
This church is affiliated with the Unitarian Universalist Association of Congregations, headquartered in Boston, Massachusetts, and the Joseph Priestley District. Unitarian Universalist churches are self-governing and self-sustaining, and all church functions are carried out in a democratic way. We are a member congregation of Unitarian Universalists for Social Justice as well as a Welcoming Congregation.

This bill specifies that such task forces, programs, and other initiatives may not include materials or training that explicitly or implicitly promote a political agenda, make the characteristics of the victim the focus rather than the conduct of the person engaged in harassment, intimidation, or bullying, or teach or suggest that certain beliefs or viewpoints are discriminatory when an act or practice based on such belief or viewpoint is not a discriminatory practice under present human rights law.

I’m sorry to say that the key ideas expressed here are echoed in comments made by Bill Fox and other members in their defense of the first action* by the new Loudoun County School Board.

Look folks. . .we are not a civil rights advocacy group.

..it is not the job of the school board to lobby the state to make legislative changes on controversial social issues.

..we don’t think this is a School Board issue.

..not simply single out members of specific groups for protection.

But if you are trying to convince me that the proper role of school board is in part to be a LGBT activist group, then you have reached a dead end.

[The Legislative Program] is NOT for making a statement or to become agents of social change..

The key ideas here are precisely that anti-bullying policy should not be concerned with the specific characteristics of those targeted for bullying, that to respond to such targeting is promoting a political advocacy agenda, and that any challenge to the limitations of “present human rights law” in Virginia is not the proper purview of the School Board.

Meanwhile, Tennessee has lost another precious young person to anti-gay bullying. Phillip Parker, 14, took his own life this week. He was constantly bullied for being gay.

Phillip’s family said they reported their concerns over their son’s bullying to Gordonsville High School on multiple occasions, but the bullying by a group of students just got worse.

The following are the recommendations from GLSEN (Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network) for addressing anti-LGBT harassment and bullying:

1. Revise district policy to explicitly prohibit student discrimination, harassment, bullying, and intimidation based on sexual orientation, gender identity and gender expression. The school district must establish an enumerated policy for unwelcomed conduct that focuses on sex, race, ethnicity, religious belief, sexual orientation, gender identity, or gender expression. An enumerated policy is crucial to ensure that anti-bullying policies are effective for all students.

2. Require staff trainings to enable school staff to identify and address anti-LGBT name-calling, bullying, and harassment effectively and in a timely manner.

3. Support student efforts to address anti-LGBT bullying and harassment on campus, such as the formation of a Gay-Straight Alliance or participation in events such as the National Day of Silence and Ally Week.

4. Institute age-appropriate, inclusive curricula to help students understand and respect difference within the school community and society as a whole.

Under the proposed “License to Bully” law, none of these recommendations would be legal. Materials and training that would help students understand and respect gender and sexuality differences? That would “promote a political agenda” of accepting such differences as part of the human condition. Support student initiatives like the National Day of Silence? That might suggest that certain beliefs and viewpoints are discriminatory. Acknowledge that LGBT students are targeted because they are LGBT? That would make the focus the characteristics of the victim. Even suicide prevention resources like The Trevor Project would be banned.

One gets the impression from the remarks made by Loudoun County School Board members that they would dismiss GLSEN’s recommendations, which are derived from that organization’s considerable advocacy experience, exactly because they are derived from advocacy experience. It’s an odd bit of circular reasoning. In any case, any similarity, however unwitting, to the execrable agenda we are witnessing unfold in Tennessee is something they can’t run away from fast enough – if they have any sense.

School Board members: I’m not impressed by language about “civil rights advocacy,” “activist groups,” political “statements,” or “controversial social issues.” It’s your job to make policy that protects the kids. Period. Anything that presents an obstacle to such policy is a school board issue, and it’s the job of the school board to get rid of it. Anyone who says otherwise needs to be told in no uncertain terms to pound sand. No excuses.

*Regarding the Virginia Human Rights Act:

“I move to amend the Board’s previously adopted Legislative Program by removing the recommendation to expand the protected classifications contained in the Virginia Human Rights Act, Code of Virginia §2.2-3900 and §2.2-3901, to include gender orientation and gender identity and to further amend the Code of Virginia §22.1-78 to allow local school boards to similarly expand the protected classifications contained in local school board policies and regulations and that Staff be directed to make such other changes to the Legislative Program as to conform to the Program language of this motion.”